Why Do We Become Emotional?
It might be even more confusing as emotions may be triggered at unexpected times. Like my friend who initially seemed to cope with her children leaving, only to be floored by a bowl of spaghetti, sadness, anxiety and other feelings could be set off at random times.
My own meltdown moment occurred four years after my first son left home and a year after the second went away to study. I was planning Christmas and suddenly realized this was my future — trying to get as many of my family members under one roof as possible.
With my eldest planning to go to his in-laws and my other son seemingly indifferent to the whole occasion, I felt the magic of Christmas with my children was being eaten away by the reality of train timetables and planned web-chats on Christmas day.
Oh how I sobbed at the memory of small tousled-headed children excited by the holiday, the ritual of the day, even the enormous job of cooking lunch for my big family.
I have children still at home, but most of them would prefer a lie-in nowadays to an early morning sortie to check out what Santa has left.
So what can we do about feeling sad or redundant? The simple task of counting my blessings helped me.
Christmas Day might be different but I can console myself with the festivities being extended throughout the whole week as we can share a few special days with our absent family members.
A realization that there is still plenty of life left in us and that the world is our oyster can be liberating too.
With fewer socks to wash and sandwiches to make, maybe now is the time to learn that instrument, take that trip, or join that group you’d always wanted to.
Often people of menopause age find they are financially more secure so can plan the holidays or remodeling they have dreamed of for years when paying for soccer and school trips took precedence. Or maybe with your birds gone you could think about a smaller nest with less housework? Plus, a chance to release funds can make life easier and more fun.
Whatever you decide, remember menopause is not an illness, just a stage of life we can and should approach positively. However, it’s still OK to let out emotions every now and again, so curl up with a good book or movie you know will trigger the tears and cry if you want to!