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Risk of Divorce

Mar 10, 2015
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Woman sitting with her back to her husband, both looking frustrated

Risk of Divorce During Menopause

You do your best to deal with the things menopause modifies about you and your life.  The physical symptoms directly impact your daily functioning.  Hot flashes have you feeling uncomfortable during the day.  Night sweats make it more difficult to get a good night’s rest.  The changes in bladder control having you running to the bathroom at all hours, day and night.

The psychological symptoms make their presence known indirectly.  The increased risk for depression and anxiety are largely due to fluctuating hormone levels because your mind cannot keep up with the changes.  You confuse the physical symptoms as mental health symptoms.  The low self-esteem is due to the perceived changes your body is going through.  The weight gain and hair loss associated with menopause force you to rethink the way you see yourself.

After physical and psychological health, social health is affected by menopause.  It is easy to see that the way you feel physically and psychologically influences the way you relate to other people in your life.  If your symptoms are high, your social health will be more negatively affected.  In turn, if you social health is poor, your physical and psychological health are at greater risk.  Menopause is not only your problem.  It involves all people in your life.

Being a perimenopausal woman in her 40s, 50s or 60s, who is your primary social support?  Who affects you more than anyone and who is effected by you more than anyone?  Chances are you answered your husband.  The bad news is many marriages end during the menopause years.  Because of this, finding ways to improve your physical and psychological symptoms while improving your relationship is essential for a happy life during perimenopause and beyond.

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    Divorce Contributors

    You know that menopause is not just about menopause.  There are many aspects of your life occurring simultaneously.  Each piece plays their part in either making your life better or worse.  Consider these factors that contribute to divorce during the perimenopause years:

    • Empty nest – During this period of time, so much about your life is changing besides menopause. Chances are good your children are leaving the home creating the empty nest syndrome.  This refers to feelings of depression and anxiety that accompany the shift in the household when child leave.  Whether it is to college, work, military or marriage, their departure is met with mixed feelings.  You know that you will always be their mother, but somehow you feel less important and necessary.
    • Loss of loved ones – As you age, so do the others in your life. It is only a matter of time before you experience the death of people close to you.  The loss of your friends, coworkers and family members create loads of stress that will spread to other areas of your life.
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    Next page: ways to prevent divorce in menopause.

    Eric Patterson
    Eric Patterson, LPC is a professional counselor in Western Pennsylvania working for the last 10 years to help children, teens and adults achieve their goals and live happier lives. Read more about Eric and his writing at www.ericlpattersonwriting.com. See all of Eric's articles
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